Can you do too much networking?

After all, we job search coaches urge candidates to network, network, network: whether via Zoom or in person, whether 1:1 or in large groups, it’s critical, we say.

And networking is given credit for 60%-80% landing new jobs.

It’s true: it IS all of that. The human connection is more critical than ever today when technology seems to dominate so much of the search process: it will, if you let it.

But is it possible to do too much “contacting”?

I didn’t think so until a few years ago, when I met Josh, a between-jobs marketing manager in job search for about 3 months (not his real name).

A contact of his recommended we meet, so I was at the designated Caribou Coffee, hoping to learn how I might help him.

When he arrived and we shook hands, his handshake was almost like he was going through the motions. He barely smiled. As we sat down I noticed he was jumpy and fidgety, his eyes darting about.

When he talked, he was racing through his “commercial” and his list of target companies.

He kept rubbing his face as if trying to stay awake.

Finally, I gestured a “stop” with my hand, and asked: “How ARE you, really? How is all this going for you?”

He paused. “You’re right…I’m exhausted…you are my 12th in-person networking meeting this week and I have 2 more tomorrow.”

I couldn’t hide my shock: “What?!”

I quickly calculated the time involved, the energy one needs to summon for each contact meeting whether in person or via video chat, the post-meeting TY note and ongoing follow up, endorsing others while asking for endorsements for himself…and how could he have so many meetings and still keep up with applying and updating his resume and profile, posting on LinkedIn, researching companies and teams, while still living a normal life with his family?

And shook my head.

“Sometimes I do 15 a week…that’s always my goal”, Josh added. OMG.

He complained that it was not proving to be “the panacea you coaches and even recruiters always talk about”, because he’d had very few requests for his resume and no “real” interviews from all those meetings.

I replied, “I think I can help you best by giving you my impressions of what you’ve said so far, and how you can make some adjustments that’ll help you. How does that sound?” He was open to that, so we talked.

He realized he was sounding rushed and harried and exhausted but didn’t know how else to do “all this networking”.

Which was the problem. As it often is with job hunters because they focus on what leads they’re hoping for instead of the relationship…they are looking to hunt instead of plant seeds and harvest.

Here’s what I said to him and what I’d say to you:

• First, I’d recommend no more than 5-7 one-on-one networking meetings a week, whether in person or via video chat. That would enable you to really focus on those people and how YOU can help THEM. And focus on follow up and taking each connection more seriously as a beginning to a relationship.

• Pace yourself – don’t do all 5 in one day. Spread the meetings out across the week.

• Mix it up – mix in brand-new contacts with second meetings, and with friends you’ve lost touch with. Each one of these has its own energy demands on you so you can vary it to better pace yourself.

• Know what you’re after: OTHER CONNECTIONS. You want to leave with NAMES. Think you’re after “hidden leads”? Most openings aren’t hidden today. BUT, you can learn of plans to hire early in their process by doing these referral meetings, becoming someone they’ll invite to apply: as I say, “get known so you can get nominated”.

• I don't recommend using “one page networker” tools as much any more because people don’t know what to do with them as they don’t hang on to paper items very long today. And they look too much like a resume. Instead, emphasize with contacts that everything about you is on your LinkedIn profile. They will likely go there anyway before your appointment with them. So keep your profile fresh with comments using the language of your field, on others’ posts, and post some of your own. Don’t make updates and changes and then forget about it, keep it alive and interesting and conversational so that your expertise shines through.

• Make it clear that while yes, you’re in job search, you are expanding your network on an ongoing basis, so this is about getting to know what it is that THEY need. Say this when you are making the appointment, say it in the meeting, say it at the end, and say it in any follow ups. And mean it.

Through the person who referred Josh, I heard he landed a new role, great news.

I hope it was in part because he did effective networking, based on relationship, and enough to energize his search, instead of too much “networking for leads or who you know who might have leads” which exhausts a search.

And keeping it in balance with all other search activities, so that you stay positive and keep up your energy.

He deserved that.

And so do you.