by: Joanne Meehl

As speaker and New Thought philosopher Byron Katie says, "If you pick an argument with reality, you always lose."

The #1 best thing you can do for your job search is to accept its reality.

The reality of its ups and downs. Of bad decisions made -- by you, about you. And good decisions. The lack of response, the disappointing responses, the upbeat responses. The aloneness and the sharing of joy. The learning: about careers, about job search today, about those who've left your side, those who are supporting you, and about yourself.

When a job hunter surrounds herself with others who blame the economy, age discrimination, company policies, immigrants, rich people, outsourcing, government programs, lack of government programs, weight, or similar for their long searches, she's finding a way to hide from the reality of her search. When another candidate spends hours participating in chat room discussions condemning the injustice of a lack of response from HR, he is dwelling in the negative and avoiding the reality of, say, making new contacts instead. If any candidate is all woe is me, and is settling in to a wishing and hoping mentality, then they are in denial of reality. And all of them are frittering away energy that needs to be focused on their searches.

I don't like telling candidates that this is reality -- that companies do make biased decisions, that companies are taking forever to choose finalists, that this job search is nothing like your last one. But I do like doing what works: and that means encouraging candidates to accept job search reality, then do what works IN that reality. When they do this, their searches are more effective, shorter, and they land jobs that they want and which areright for them. And isn't that the whole idea?

Embrace reality. Byron Katie also says: "All the stress that we feel is caused by arguing with what is."?Make what is your friend.?You deserve to.

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Wondering about taking the first BEST steps in your search, so that you're not looking for a long time? Contact Joanne.